Part 1 (Masters, Experts and Novices)

Start at SH405 in GS0355. Listen to the pace notes in this mp3 file  (about 2 MBytes). Click to download the file and play it in, for example, Windows Media Player or perhaps load it onto your iPod.

Part 2 (Masters Only)

Continue by listening to the pace notes in this mp3 file  (about 1 MByte). Click to download the file and play it in, for example, Windows Media Player or perhaps load it onto your iPod.

Hint: I could only afford cheap voice-overs, so you may have to listen carefully in places.

A few complained about the quality of the recordings. This was mostly deliberate as helmeted co-drivers in noisy rally cars driven by a lunatic drivers through forests will appreciate. Admittedly most navigators don't have "serial killer" or "anonymous phone caller" voices. There should have been enough redundancy in the notes to miss the occasional one and still get the route correct.
Apologies to those who didn't like the reference to the squashed bunny; only virtual animals were killed in the making of this Route Card.
The actual words that were fed into the text to speech synthesiser were:

Part 1

Part 2

right at crossroads onto tarmac.   ignore left.  turn right onto gravel.  70 right,  70 right.  right at T.  400 metres onto tarmac.  90 left.  straight on at crossroads.  ignore left.  Stop. I've dropped my map. {{Pause=0.50}}   Got it. Go.  right at crossroads onto gravel.  30 left, ignore right.  turn right.  bump over the letter s.  hairpin left at T.  Use path after Cruglass  slight left, turn left.  60 right.  left at T.  ignore left.  turn right.  75 left.  hairpin left.  1200 metres left at tee then 90 right.  care, left at T. {{Pause=0.25}}  Slow. There's a rabbit in the road. {{Pause=0.50}}   Squashed it. Go.  ignore left.  care, 90 right.  right at T onto tarmac.  1000 metres ignore right then immediately turn right onto gravel.  bends then care, left at T.  90 right.  90 left then left at T at main road onto tarmac,  care, bump over spot height.  ignore left.  1400 metres turn left onto gravel.  care, 90 right.  turn left.  right at crossroads.  turn right.  left at T.  left at T.  turn right.  turn hairpin left.  Faster, there's a car behind us.  ignore left.  ignore left.  ignore right at eff.  right at T onto tarmac.  turn left onto gravel.  twisty for two kilometres.  right at T onto tarmac.  ignore left.  turn left onto gravel.  straight on at crossroads.  ignore left.  turn left.  left at crossroads.  ignore left.  ignore left.  straight on at crossroads, I think.  ignore right.  continue to tarmac road and stop.

four instances of red carbon.  arrow.  red baseball playing field.  O.{{Pause=0.4}}  F.{{Pause=0.4}}  E.{{Pause=0.4}}  up, up.  up.  up.  down, down.  6.  touch 5 twice.  touch graticule twice..  get cross five times.  depart north north east from the square root of 3,969.  don't phone the church.  unlucky bue line, twice.  12768 50520.  three times 12.  phone church.  eleven squared plus two squared.  get off the green as soon as possible.  rejoin in 11 52.  five three two five.  go up three times and then phone me.  capital F.{{Pause=0.4}}  capital O.{{Pause=0.4}}  double descend.  ascend.  phone church.  get down.  three inclinations.  capital C.{{Pause=0.4}}  use white road.  stop at bridge.

"I think I need to get my ears and eyes tested :-)" Catherine Buck
"Disappointing. A good idea but for me a test of hearing and comprehension rather than navigation skills." John Evans

Route Card Winner: John Evans